Tails About Town: The Funny Things Dogs Do

This is a tail (spelling intended) of the funny things dogs do. Well, the bizarre things Fletcher does…


Science has come up with various explanations for the things dogs do; humping, marking territory, howling etc but I often wonder whether they could explain the enigma that is Fletcher. For a light-hearted read, I thought I’d put together a list of a few funny things he does on a daily basis:

Black spaniel dog called Fletcher owned by our editor Emma Kemsley sitting with a stick

Morning chatterbox


Fletcher sleeps in the kitchen. Usually my husband heads down first where an over excited Fletcher greets him with a hug. An actual hug. He’ll jump up and wrap his paws around his neck accompanied by a high pitch squeal and lots of licks. He’ll then charge upstairs to where I’m getting ready, throw himself on the floor for a belly rub and squeak and squeal. It’s a peculiar noise, one of happiness for sure, but it is rather odd.

Mucky pup

After each walk he’ll be towel dried outside on the doorstep. Why does he then insist on waiting until he is inside to shake?

Sloppy spaniel

Fletcher can’t drink properly. He’ll dunk his snout and ears into the bowl, slurp, slurp, slurp, then lift his head only to let the last glug fall out of his mouth all over the floor, accompanied by dripping ears. As a result my kitchen floor is constantly wet. He’ll then drip all the way to the other side of the room while I follow him with a mop. At first I thought it was a spaniel thing, it’s not, it’s a Fletcher thing! He also drinks a LOT, and yes, I’ve slipped over numerous times on the puddles.

Tea and biscuits

When I sit down for my first cup of tea of the day, Fletcher has to have a biscuit; a Pedigree Markies to be exact, nothing else will do. And if I forget…well, he doesn’t give me that option. He’ll pester me until he gets one.

Belly rubs

We all know dogs love a belly rub, however Fletcher takes it a step further. Tickle his belly and he’ll use his paw to push your hand down to his, ahem…willy! Yes, really.

This is not a game

Now this is a fairly new trait, and one I’m not finding amusing. If I’m sitting on the sofa, taking 10 minutes with a cup of tea, Fletcher will drop his tennis ball straight into my mug. Talk about taking attention seeking to a whole new level!


I’ve mentioned this before, read the full story here, but Fletcher will howl to every siren he hears, as well as the Lloyds TSB advert. It’s hilarious when out in public, but not so funny when I’m working from home, on the phone, and have to wait for him to stop before continuing the conversation.

Sweet dreams

Fletcher is full of life and bounces everywhere, he can’t keep still even in his sleep. While snoozing he’ll twitch or mimic running. It’s usually accompanied by squeaking or subtle little growls. So cute!

Clumsy cocker

From knocking things over to running into things, Fletcher is so clumsy. He causes chaos where ever he goes. He has knocked over a market stall, candles, tables and chairs, a water butt, a BBQ…the list is endless!

Happy pup

Fletcher gets excited about everything, EVERYTHING! He is incapable of walking and insists on running everywhere. His tail wags continuously. He is happy about every new day, walk, person, dog, car ride and treat. He simply loves life. I think we could all do with being a little more Fletcher. Can I make #bemorefletcher a thing?


One of the funniest characteristics of Fletcher is that he is a massive whimp. He is sensitive soul. Pull a leaf out of his fur and he’ll scream. Rough play with another dog, he’ll cry (to be fair his friend Juno did recently sit on his head). Accidentally tread on his paw and it’s the end of the world. Even if he thinks there’s a chance he might get hurt, he’ll scream before anything has happened.

On top of this usual behaviour this month Fletcher has a new obsession with eating pumpkin and has given me a near heart attack after he disappeared chasing pheasants…three times!

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