Tails About Town: The Poo Police
Written by Emma Kemsley
Somebody in my village is on a mission – a quest to take down irresponsible dog owners who don’t pick up after their pooch. Either that or there’s a dog in Essex that’s fouling luminous pink poo!
It’s caused quite the debate among the village. Who are the poo police? Is it really necessary? Is he/she making the problem worse? Here’s my honest opinion on the topic – I may not put this month’s copy of eastlife in my local pub in case I get taken down by the mob (I’m still not accustomed to village life – I’m a city girl at heart), but this is what I think…
Firstly, I’d like to point out that I’m a responsible dog owner. I always pick up Fletcher’s droppings – and believe me, he can poop! You’d think he was the size of an Alsatian. Plus, he likes an audience so will always wait to let go at the most awkward moments; the main road, the middle of a market, crowds of people – you get the picture.
We like to walk over the fields at lunch time, but over the last year I’ve noticed that the dog poo that
occasionally lies at the edge of the footpath has been spray-painted bright pink, highlighting the crime for all to see! I understand that dog poo isn’t pleasant, but in a field in the middle of no where that’s only ever used by dog walkers, is it really necessary? The pink splodges look more unsightly than the poo, which would eventually disintegrate into the ground. Wouldn’t it be more beneficial to pick it up? If you have time to spray it, you can pick it up! And yes, I realise it’s the owner’s responsibility but if you’re trying to help, picking it up would seem the obvious choice.
And what effect is this paint having on the plants and wildlife? I read an article in the local magazine that said its environmentally friendly – I find it hard to believe. Anything that comes from a pressurized can is going to include some sort of harmful ingredient.
There is a serious lack of dog bins on this particular route, only one at the beginning, which means you have to walk miles with a poo bag in your hand. I tend to leave mine and loop round on myself, picking it up on the way back. This however has led to another problem. The poo police now hunts down poo bags left on trees. This happens if you have the intention of picking it up on your return but somehow change route. I’ll admit its happened once or twice but I always pick it up the next day. My question is, if it’s in a bag why do you still need to spray it? I think it would be more sensible to pick it 
up and put it in the bin – it’s not like you have to do the dirty work! Maybe a petition for more waste bins would be a better use of time?
I even question whether poo bags should be a thing. It’s adding to the plastic problem. Are there bio-gradable doggy bags? If so, please let me know!
The poo police have been in force for over a year now, squirting fields, the park and trees. A friend of mine tells me its happening in Hertford too – has the squad expanded? However, it’s had no impact what so ever. In fact, the poo over the field is now even worse. It’s like the dog-walkers are rebelling! And I don’t blame them, I’ve had enough too. You’ve made your point, nothing has happened. Now, if you can paint it, you can pick it up – that goes for the poo police and pet owners!
